Patriots and Fact-fighters, we Conservatives have no love for Hollywood’s PETULANT RULING-CLASS of elite, liberal communist, self-made millionaires, but perhaps we’ve judged the Hollywood Scum-o-crats too harshly. Maybe they’re not all bad. Maybe they’re not all hateful leftists who advocate ANTI-AMERICAN things like “peace,” and “tolerance.”
Jon Voight’s not one of those Hanoi Janes! Jon Voight knows what’s up. Trump’s up, baby! Up BIGLY in the count of LEGAL, NON-THEM-O-CRAT-CAST VOTES! And now, Jon Voight’s sending perhaps the most PATRIOTIC, AMERICAN MESSAGE that’s ever been uttered on these Jesus-loving shores, from sea to shining sea…
THE TIME FOR PEACE IS OVER! BURN THIS MF’ER TO THE GROUND!
“Let me warn you all that we are in great danger if we fall under a Biden Administration … I ask all to fight this battle now, to get them all out. I’ve been attacked by my fellow peers, saying I am preaching violence when the truth is, they all are. The left are burning and destroying our cities. We are willing to fight for freedom. Not freedom to burn down our flag, but to raise her up with the glory of this land of the free, but the left are trying to stop these truths. Let us bring justice.”Jon Voight, Patriotism & Violence Inciter
Jon Voight has had about enough of your shit, you DEMOCRACY-LOVING FREAKS! It’s time to take out the trash!
And while the Lib-o-tards might scoff at this 81-year-old multimillionaire inciting violence in the name of preserving the Patriotic American Shit-Show known as the Trump Presidency, don’t forget Jon Voight knows the Transformers. Not only does that put a team of indestructible, transforming Super-Robots on Team Trump, it also means Jon Voight knows Transformers director Michael Bay, who has unleashed more explosions and firepower on the world than the entire U.S. Military COMBINED.
Crapping your pants yet, Sleepy Joe and The Dem-o-scums?
But, despite Voight’s overwhelming tactical advantage, he’s very clear that he’s not calling for violence. He’s simply asking, “all to fight this battle now, to get them all out.” He didn’t say HOW to get them out. Maybe we could just ask nicely for them to suspend the Constitution because of evidence we haven’t produced that the entire election was rigged.
But, make no mistake, while Jon Voight’s not calling for violence, he’s also not not-calling-for-violence. He never responds to the charge from his opponents that he’s “preaching violence,” despite bringing it up, himself. Instead, GEN. “MAD-DOG” VOIGHT goes on the attack against the people IMPRISONING HIM IN A COMMUNIST HELL-STATE, by making him put some cloth over his face while he’s outside just to prevent thousands of deaths.
“He’s a disgrace to mankind,” Voight heroically says of California’s Lib-o-crat Governor Gavin Newsom, judging-not-lest-he-want-to-judge. “He is a lie, like all the left that are trying to destroy the USA.”
The man IS a LIE. A man so evil, he’s actually BECOME A LIE! It doesn’t have to make sense, SOROS-LOVERS! Just agree with it! DEMS BAD! DEMS BAD! “We must get governor Newsom out,” Voight demands. “He’s destroying the people’s freedom.”
But the best is saved for last, because while Jon Voight doesn’t want violence–far from it, in fact–make no mistake, this is a civil war against “evil” in which PATRIOTS are being “targeted” and God, “Jesus, Moses, and all saints” are going to protect the TRUMP-ALLEGIANTS in this “BATTLE.”
Which, admittedly, sounds a lot like a call for violence… if you’re a stupid lib who doesn’t get TRUTH!
“Let the truth show itself, that President Trump is the only man who can save this nation. Let us fight this evil now and know that God’s truths will expose them all. Let me ask all to pray in the name of Jesus, Moses, and all saints for their hands of safety to be on us now. The way in which we are being targeted will be hard to fix, but with all your love and prayers and truths we can win this battle against this evil force that has taken over this country … We must remember who we are. We are a nation that fought the Civil War, and we won that battle. Let’s not give up.”Jon Voight, High Priest Of The Trump Cult
Jon Voight’s going BALLS-TO-THE-WALL to fight this NON-VIOLENT CIVIL WAR by posting HEROICALLY unhinged calls for MASS VIOLENCE on social media from his mansion in Beverly Hills. The least you can do, humble DEPLORABLES, is to take to the streets and risk your lives to overthrow the LIBERALLY-BIASED AMERICAN DEMOCRATIC PROCESS in order to keep a rich, out-of-touch, former Democrat billionaire in office so he can continue to embezzle taxpayer money for him, his adult children, and his enormous rolodex of bootlickers and SPINELESS CRONIES.
It’s SO SIMPLE!
Or, you could be like Jon Voight’s LOSER DAUGHTER Angelina Jolie, and do nothing instead of fighting to stop the people trying to STEAL THIS ELECTION BY COUNTING LEGAL VOTES.
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Wherever there’s a pile of sawdust-filled meat stuffed into a tortilla, or a bathroom toilet overflowing from a massive dump, you can be sure that not far away is a Taco Bell.
And you can be sure that inside that Taco Bell, America’s founding principles of capitalism and obesity are being practiced.
But in Downey, California, freedom has withered. The smell of spicy meat no longer emanates from loosely cleaned microwaves. Mountain Dew Baja Blast no longer flows from the taps. Cheese is no longer rolled up in a tortilla and sold as a menu item.
The world’s first Taco Bell–Taco Bell número uno–is closed.
It went out of business long ago. This 400 square-foot slice of paradise stopped selling delicious taco-like food products during the Reagan Administration, when business dwindled due to the rise of bigger, more popular restaurants with modern innovations like “indoor seating” and “drive throughs.” A new era was dawning, and Taco Bell Número Uno was left in the past.
During a decade when wolves roamed Wall Street and girls just wanted to have fun, this little slice of “clielo” (Spanish for “heaven”) couldn’t keep up with the rabid consumption economy of a country that just wanted more and more. America didn’t have time to wait 2 minutes for its tacos; it needed them in one. The joys of a simpler time were cast aside in order to embrace the coming fast-food revolution. Taco Bell Número Uno was forgotten, left to wither in the cold California sun, left to fade like the brightest stars of Tinseltown all inevitably did once their glory days passed. By the time George Herbert Walker Bush took office, not even the rats wanted its artificial cheesefood.
They say there’s no place lonlier than being alone. That was true of Taco Bell Número Uno.
There were the memories. So many great memories, spanning so many good years. There was opening day 1962, when Taco Bell’s founder, Glenn Bell, handed over the very first Taco Bell taco to an unsuspecting customer who had no idea what he was in for when he crunched into that 19-cent slice of faux-Mexican deliciousness. There was the first mariachi performance, which was held on the stage out back across from the fire pits, and all the white people pretending they liked it. And there was the time that guy fell in the fire pit and died, and they buried his body out in the desert without calling the cops. So many good memories.
If you lived in Downey, Californa between 1962 and 1986, Taco Bell was like your Times Square. It was the crossroads of the universe, where culture, art, and food intersected in a symphony of taste, sound, and light, very cheap lights from the Home Depot, to be exact.
This little taco stand, no bigger than a two-car garage, with its mission-style arches and its lack of indoor seating, changed the world. It took a fast food industry wedded to the idea of burgers and fries and turned it on its head by showing what happened if you just think outside the bun for once.
Now there are Taco Bells in every corner of the Earth. Sure they might not have mariachi bands and fire pits, but they have chairs, and they have the one thing that has never faded since Taco Bell Número Uno opened on that fateful day in 1962: people that like tacos.
It was safe in this knowledge that Taco Bell Número Uno could accept its ultimate fate. By December 2014, the Bell had tolled for Taco Bell Número Uno. The wheels of capitalism stop for no man, woman or restaurant. A vacant lot must be cleared and the seeds of new business must be planted, so profits can spring anew. Taco Bell número uno was set to be demolished this year.
Or so it thought.
You see, Taco Bell never forgot about Taco Bell.
And on November 19, Taco Bell cleared the lot upon which the world’s first Taco Bell sat, not by smashing Taco Bell Número Uno to bits with a crude wrecking ball but by giving it new life.
The restaurant was loaded onto the back of a flat-bed truck, mission-style arches and all, for a glorious 45-mile parade through scenic Downey, California to its temporary resting place at Taco Bell Headquarters on Glenn Bell way in Irvine.
The entire event was livestreamed online to potentially dozens.
A Taco Bell being driven around on the back of a flat bed truck was livestreamed.
Perhaps it’s a fate befitting the restaurant founded by Glen Bell that the move isn’t a last ride, but rather a new beginning. After all, Bell launched numerous, short-lived franchise failures–Bell’s Burgers, Taco Tia and El Taco–before birthing his Taco masterpiece.
Perhaps Taco Bell Número Uno, like Glenn Bell, can rise from the ashes to accomplish something even greater, and remind us that, like the cheese scraps we all secretly scoop up and eat at the end of our Taco Bell meal, there’s still greatness left in all of us.
Taco Bell says the building’s future and its final location are yet to be decided. Here’s hoping they’ll think outside the bun, just like the great Glenn Bell, founder of Taco Bell Número Uno.