This story has been updated below to reflect an awesome parody song.
The Supreme Court’s hideously disgusting “ruling” on the landmark Obamacare case King v. Burwell today will not be referenced on this website.
This is a place of FREEDOM. This is a family website where so-called “facts” about disgusting verbal spew like the “fact” that Obamacare is now “legal” will not be allowed to tarnish the proud name of TruthMissiles.com. (And before you say that a “family website” wouldn’t have an article titled like this one, let me point out that I censored the word “Ass” in “Ass Rape” so children are perfectly safe. They have no idea what kind of rape it is. It could be a perfectly legitimate rape.)
King v. Burwell? We already had King George! We will not submit to another KING! Get your liberal lies somewhere else!
We will, however, applaud freedom fighters when they exhibit exceptional freedom in the fight for freedom. And today we honor Supreme Court Justice and Danny Devito stunt-double Antonin Scalia, who stood up in the face of Pseudo-Conservative Chief Justice John Roberts’ OBAMACARE TYRANNY today and delivered a SCATHING dissent to Roberts’ embarrassing abortion of a ruling that Obamacare is, in fact, *gag* “legal.”
Most of the MAINSTREAM MEDIA only reported this quote from Scalia’s dissent:
“The Court’s next bit of interpretive jiggery-pokery involves other parts of the Act that purportedly presuppose the availability of tax credits on both federal and state Exchanges.”
And, predictably, liberal stooges found it amusing for some reason…
But, as usual, the media failed to provide context. So it falls to us to provide Scalia’s full quote, in its entirety, which we do now for your information…
“The Court’s next bit of interpretive jiggery-pokery involves other parts of the Act that purportedly presuppose the availability of tax credits on both federal and state Exchanges. Through an argle-bargle of huffle-pufflery the Court has concocted a ludibrious brabble over Obamacare’s subsidies that is sure to jargoggle the noggin of any sane onlooker and put America’s financials in the ketchup to the tune of $700 billion simolions. And much as I’d like to freck out of this court with a trunk full of happy cabbage and flub the dub, even a zib knows that leaving America’s healthcare in the hands of a John Hollowlegs for tyranny like Obama in order to go on a toot across the countryside before plopping down on a donkey’s breakfast would simply gazoozle the denizens of the Republic, in addition to leaving yours truly with a considerable case of the zings. Though to be perfectly honest, Ginsburg and I are no strangers to the zings, after all we often engage in late eve debauchery, and I find an early morning cluck and grunt served with high-wine allows one to shake off last night’s jiggly puffery in much less than the fortnight that would be required by an average butter and egg man, allowing me to deliciate without becoming an everyday jollux. Hopefully you won’t find my tales too off the cob or ketch too loudly upon hearing them. But I digress. What I am saying is that Obama has a sanguinolency that can only be satiated by the expiry of millions of Americans at the feet of his jibber jabber of a healthcare statute that is pure collyweston. Pure fiddle-faddle. Nothing but the bafflegab of a blatherskite mixed with the humbuggery of a flapdoodling fool. Claptrap. Tommyrot. Monkeyshine. Horsefeathers. Smoking the piffle. Pure applesauce if I may say so myself. In other words Obamacare is bulls***.”
Finally a man who speaks the language of the people!
UPDATE: Twitter user @SongADayMann made a tremendous song about Scalia’s heroic dissent…