I don’t know what net neutrality is. And, frankly, I never really gave a s***… until today.

That’s because TODAY, President Barack HUSSEIN Obama announced his support for net neutrality in a statement and a newfangled videotaped message…

My first reaction to this socialist video-festo was, “what, no jacket?” Were your president clothes at the dry cleaners again?

And, my second reaction was obviously, “Sound like Obamacare much?”

Which, not coincidentally, was the sentiment shared by Senator Ted Cruz’s communications and analogies director Amanda Carpenter, via Twitter…

Cruz, himself, even weighed in on this ASSAULT ON FREEDOM…

Yes, internet should not operate at the speed of government, libs! And neither should health!

Now at last, I know where I stand on net neutrality. I oppose it. And all it took was for Obama to take a position in favor of it (and they wonder why he didn’t support the Democratic candidates in the midterms).

Unfortunately, in order to take a position on net neutrality, I had to learn something… what net neutrality is.

So if I had to learn, so do you!

In short, data on the Internet has historically moved between all parties without being slowed down or sped up from certain sites by Internet Service Providers, like Comcast or Verizon, based on how poor or rich you are. Everyone has had an equal right to give and receive information. In other words, the Internet is socialist. This evil is called net neutrality.

Now, as ISP’s consider creating Internet “fast lanes,” which will cost more to use, and “slow lanes,” for the other 47% of poor people and Obama voters, the government, aka Obama, wants to make an FCC rule protecting net neutrality.

But, heroic corporations like Comcast and Verizon, inspired by the universal light of freedom, are saying, “Hey Obummer! You don’t need to make that rule because we will respect net neutrality on our own. Just trust us. We won’t try to make more money. When have we ever done that?”

Or, to put things even more simply, the Internet is Obamacare.

Of course, some liberal egg heads who know MS-DOS and “understand computers and internets” say, that Cruz’s analogy is off base just because net neutrality and Obamacare don’t objectively have anything in common…

“Ted Cruz and his team have the facts wrong about net neutrality. Obama specifically said the government would NOT be in charge of pricing: “I believe the FCC should reclassify consumer broadband service under Title II of the Telecommunications Act — while at the same time forbearing from rate regulation and other provisions less relevant to broadband services.”

Convinced yet? It goes on…

“The government will not determine the speed of the internet, it will simply stop ISPs from slowing service down. Obama is asking private companies to treat their customers fairly; there is no part of his plan that involves the government seizing control of providers.”

The LIBS just don’t get it.

Any TRUE PATRIOT understands that just because no part of the current plan involves anything remotely similar to Obamacare doesn’t mean that net neutrality isn’t the same as Obamacare.

“Don’t see the similarities? Let me take a look…” -Whatever the f*** that thing is

It’s like how just because a commercial for a cable and internet provider tells you that you’ll pay a certain price for their services doesn’t mean that you’ll actually pay that price. There are fees and small print.

That’s why I trust the ISPs to tell the truth on this: because Obama’s talking points are just his commercial… but OBAMACARE is the fine print!

Wait, maybe that’s a bad example…

Regardless, net neutrality is Obamacare.

And by the same logic, here are some other things that I believe Ted Cruz can rightly say are the SAME…

MUSLIMS and TERRORISTS

BLACK PEOPLE and CRIMINALS

OBAMA and HITLER

HAWAII and KENYA

FACT and FOX

SCIENCE and BELIEFS

TRUTH and BULLS***

Follow @truth_missiles on Twitter for more truth.